{"id":478,"date":"2013-12-12T15:19:09","date_gmt":"2013-12-12T15:19:09","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/18.191.22.100\/?p=478"},"modified":"2013-12-12T15:19:09","modified_gmt":"2013-12-12T15:19:09","slug":"jewish-jokes-for-parshas-vayechi","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.fargate.dev.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/jewish-jokes-for-parshas-vayechi\/","title":{"rendered":"Jewish Jokes for Parshas Vayechi"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>BE YOURSELF<\/p>\n<p>In this week&#8217;s Torah portion, Yaakov (Jacob) blesses all of his children, highlighting through his blessings each son&#8217;s particular strengths. The only way that we can achieve our unique purpose in this world is to be aware of our good points, which we can then channel for the service of G-d. <\/p>\n<p>Here are two examples of how that might play out.<\/p>\n<p>1. Reuven is very tall.<br \/>\nWhat should he do with his exceptional height?<br \/>\nA. Tell TALL tales.<br \/>\nB. Get HIGH on whiskey.<br \/>\nC. Look DOWN at anybody shorter than him.<br \/>\nD. Lift up the Torah scroll very high by <a href=\"http:\/\/www.torahcafe.com\/chief-rabbi-lord-jonathan-sacks\/how-to-perform-hagbah-and-gelila-video_1639da030.html\" target=\"_blank\" rel=\"noopener noreferrer\">Hagbah<\/a>. <\/p>\n<p>2. Shimon is very funny.<br \/>\nWhat should he do with his outstanding comic talents?<br \/>\nA. Make violent demonstrations. After all, they are a RIOT.<br \/>\nB. Knock everybody over so that they will all be ON THE FLOOR.<br \/>\nC. Tell the farmer not to drink his milk because it smells FUNNY.<br \/>\nD. Use his comic talents to make people HAPPY!<\/p>\n<p>By Yankel Moskowitz <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>BE YOURSELF In this week&#8217;s Torah portion, Yaakov (Jacob) blesses all of his children, highlighting through his blessings each son&#8217;s particular strengths. The only way that we can achieve our [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"sfsi_plus_gutenberg_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_show_text_before_share":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_type":"","sfsi_plus_gutenberg_icon_alignemt":"","sfsi_plus_gutenburg_max_per_row":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v15.9.1 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Jewish Jokes for Parshas Vayechi - Jewish Resources<\/title>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.fargate.dev.torahmates.org\/jewish-resources\/jewish-jokes-for-parshas-vayechi\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Jewish Jokes for Parshas Vayechi - Jewish Resources\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"BE YOURSELF In this week&#8217;s Torah portion, Yaakov (Jacob) blesses all of his children, highlighting through his blessings each son&#8217;s particular strengths. 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